The Boy in the Moon

I arrived in East York via subway expecting a routine community service trip. Typically, the RSGC crowd arrives to compile the necessary hours, feigns interest and compassion, and leaves without being profoundly impacted. L'Arche was completely different, and ten colleagues and I left the chapel into the blustery November night having been emotionally touched. Everything suddenly seemed clearer, the music was louder, and I was grateful for every opportunity I presently had. There were no hokey, contrived scenarios created for us, but a brief video on the heroic Jean Vanier and a weekly, informal chapel service for the inhabitants of the home provided us with a unique and heartwarming experience. What struck me was the lack of self-pity the mentally disabled individuals had. Nearly every community member contributed to prayers by wishing well for their parents, or for a peer who was preparing to undergo surgery. I felt experiences with the mentally disabled would be impossible to describe in words, but Ian Brown's piercing novel The Boy in the Moon does just that, making for a thought provoking and compelling read.

Brown makes very interesting observations of L'Arche communities in Montreal and France. He arrives under full knowledge that Walker is far too young for the exclusively adult environment, and notes the gargantuan waiting list. Skepticism seems to be the tone throughout most of chapter eleven, yet Brown emerges impressed and impacted by L'Arche.

"Surrounded for the first time in my life by intellectually disabled adults I had only just met, I suddenly realized I didn't feel nervous." (190) In the company of members of the L'Arche community, Brown is surprised to feel comfortable. He is also impressed by how well the church service functions and quickly agrees that Vanier's concept of giving the disabled a place of their own "was an idea I thought I could get behind." (196)

The peace in the L'Arche environment is almost overwhelming for Brown at times, which gives him a positive impression of what life would be like for Walker. "Had they been smoking kindness?" (197) Additionally, for several pages, he is in awe of some of the ideas presented by Vanier. Once Brown opens up to discuss means of communication with Walker, Vanier asks a profound question to which Brown reveals "I stared at him. I had no answer." (208) Although Brown can never fully wrap his head around the unique aspects of L'Arche, Vanier's thoughts greatly appeal to him. Ultimately, he learns from the disabled individuals in the same manner as he does from Walker, and mentions that "they reminded me not to be ashamed." (219)

When my family owned a house in Maryland, one of our family friends had a mentally disabled son, who came to visit us quite often. I could only build a vague idea of the situation at hand. Ian Brown spares no details in the memoirs, and these helped me to understand what life with a profoundly disabled child would be like.

Having to endure life with Walker constantly taxed Ian Brown and the rest of his family. The boy poses many difficulties that one would never dream of. In the first few pages of the novel, Brown describes Walker punching himself in the head, having to feed him through an IV stand, the process of changing diapers, and the bottle ritual. The endless work Brown needed to perform to ensure the safety of an eight-year old boy was unimaginably trying and required incredible commitment. He was also forced to deal with a difficult question: "What is the value of a life like his- a life lived in the twilight, and often in pain?" (3) In what I felt was far and away the most eye-opening and disturbing scene of the novel, Ian and Johanna discuss tests that reveal potential defects. "'If there'd been a test when I was pregnant that revealed what Walker's life would have been like, I would have had the abortion.'" (181) The mere concept that Walker's parents will never know what goes through his mind, or what their lives would have been like without him is shocking.

1) If Walker were to be fully functional for ten minutes, what would be one question you would ask him?

2) What regrets do you have in the manner that you raised Walker?

3) Without the presence of Walker, do you think that Hayley's life would have been better and more fulfilling?